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Old 14-12-17, 22:27   #1
inter1977
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Default Betting addition - help tp return debts

Hello

I am writing this sad story of one of my good friend and we really need help and advices.
He came to me with story two days ago and i was firstly shocked and after that i cant stop to think about this and had different emotional episodes. I am doint now my best to help me, but situation is terrible,complicated and very dangerous and sad.

He asked me two days ago that we go out and discuss something important. I expect to hear some stories about business advices, about some plans in the future, health, some good news, who knows, but what i heard shocked me.

He started his story that he came to the end and that his life is destroyed. I was scared because he was so strange, scared, sad, desperat, out of control and never saw him in this condition before.

Here is his story shortly. He made incredible big loses on sports betting in past 5-6 years and he has huge debts. He explained that he came in situation that he can not pay his bills to banks of this debts. His wife will left him with kids and all his life is destroyed. He didint asked me for money, to help him with some money because this debts are so huge that its simply incredible. I am thinking how he could made so huge debts, but that is another story. He admited that he stopped with betting last month when he saw how he explained that he came to the end and that his life is totally destroyed. I could not believe in all this. He asked for professional help with addition and he will start soon with some meetings and therapy. He is optimistic with this process and he swear that he will never again in his life place any bet because sports betting destroyed his life totally. He know that he is sick and that is also good i think. He knows this problems, he asked self for help and all this are good signs. But everything in his life is now complicated. I think that it will be worse when his wife move from him with kids. But that is not the sorst. He had so huge debts that i really dont know what he can do here, but i promised that i will try to help him to find some possible solutions. I could also help him with money, but i just bought new hous two months ago and my almost all saved money is invested in new hous and i also asked for new credits to buy this house. All i can do is help with small lender but that is really nothing compared with his total debts that is more then his two years salary. (He need to work at least 2 years and dont to use any money and not to eat anything to pay this, that is of course imposible).

But i promised that we will try to find some solutions. So i question for you. I am wondering is there any help that he can get as he prove that he is sick and that he lost all this money on betting? I know this is stupid question and know probably that there is not somethink like that or all of us could use money for sports betting and later ask for help. But thinking about his situation and fact that his life is totally destroyed now (he is losing his family, hourse, car...everything, and still will have extremly huge debts)...I am wondering is there any kind of help for this cases? He explained that he lost a biggest part of that money at three big online bookies. Can they in some cases and under some conditions refund one part of this money in form of paying one part of debts? Or guys, do you have any advice what he can do now? Situation is good about his addition and his motivation to finish for ever with gamling and sports betting, but his financial situation is totally chaos and he need help there as soon as possible.
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Old 15-12-17, 16:30   #2
WiserthantheCrowd
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Hi Inter1977, I think it's nice of you to be concerned about your friend. They say "a friend in need, is a friend indeed."

My take is that you won't be helping your friend with money and the money that he's lost is irrevocably gone. There is nothing you or he can do about it. He's got to write it off and start anew.

The best thing you can do for your friend is to provide him with emotional support and to make sure that he signs up for some type of gambling self-exclusion whereby his accounts are blocked for good. I presume you are based in Italy but I don't know for sure. In the UK, the corresponding site would be:

https://www.rga.eu.com/responsible-g...elf-exclusion/

There also are apps you can use to self-exclude from all gambling sites:

https://www.rga.eu.com/responsible-g...elf-exclusion/

You really need to make sure that your buddy self-excludes and that he closes all of his accounts and let's the bookies know that he's got a gambling problem so that they won't ever reopen his accounts.

If you make sure that he does that, then there may arise an issue of liability if he gambles again in the future and loses even more money. But as to what happened in the past, there is nothing that can be changed. Your buddy has to accept responsibility for what happened. In life we only learn from our mistakes and not our successes and it was a very expensive lesson for him.

Besides being there for your friend, you can also encourage him to pursue (or jointly pursue) other interests to fill the void created by gambling. Many gamblers are thrill-seekers and a new hobby (like parachuting) could compensate. But it's difficult to say without knowing your friend and his interests...

Finally, it sounds like he would really benefit from therapy or counseling especially since there now are other issues that have arisen with the wife and the kids leaving him.

Good luck!
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Old 15-12-17, 16:48   #3
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Take a loan/credit from bank, invest all of it in Bitcoin, wait few months to multiple your profits god knows how many times and then sell all. Don't use it all on one trading website, don't use just one wallet etc.
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Old 15-12-17, 17:04   #4
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Originally Posted by KL1NCUNT View Post
Take a loan/credit from bank, invest all of it in Bitcoin, wait few months to multiple your profits god knows how many times and then sell all. Don't use it all on one trading website, don't use just one wallet etc.
Dude, that's a gambler's advice to a fellow gambler with a gambling problem.

I'd say investing right now in Bitcoin is very speculative. Given the volatility, it's probably not a good solution for our Italian friend. Besides which bank would still give him a loan? He's got to go back to making money the hard way through his labor and forget about gambling. Certain real estate or some blue chip stocks might be a safer bet for him later on as well as some Bitcoin once he has the reserves to play with which won't be anytime in the near future by the sounds of it.
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Old 15-12-17, 18:06   #5
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Originally Posted by WiserthantheCrowd View Post
Dude, that's a gambler's advice to a fellow gambler with a gambling problem.

I'd say investing right now in Bitcoin is very speculative. Given the volatility, it's probably not a good solution for our Italian friend. Besides which bank would still give him a loan? He's got to go back to making money the hard way through his labor and forget about gambling. Certain real estate or some blue chip stocks might be a safer bet for him later on as well as some Bitcoin once he has the reserves to play with which won't be anytime in the near future by the sounds of it.
I am a gambler true, but I never bet on sports what I can't afford to lose, so I don't have those problems.

I disagree, Bitcoin will go up, I'm very confident about that. That's why I said that he needs to wait few months. I'm predicting very high prices in 2018 for BTC, it is mainstream and speculative but it's still limited to 21 million only and many of those were lost and locked in lost wallets that will never be accessed again. Price can only rise for something that is rare, becoming rarer and becoming mainstream so much. And about "bank" he can loan from "street boys and their bank" if he can't get any from legit banks anymore. I don't see any other option sorry. This one seems realistic and higher than 50 % possible imho. If he wants one last gamble that's 50 - 50 (I would say even higher but I won't be biased) but could solve all of his problems and possibly bring back his family, he should do that. If I was in his position I would do that, he lost everything either way so I don't think he sees way out of this. He may be possibly suicidal as well after losing literally everything not just money, I would go for it.

I'm just writing from my perspective, of course I don't know the guy and his situation fully and I wish him the best. We're invited here to give suggestions so this is just one of many that will be posted here. I think it's better to post something than nothing also. With more and more ideas his brain will get more options so he might have some use from that, if not, like you said he will have to basically start from scratch and work hard, but the problem is if his debts are so insanely big I must say that he will never return them with manual labor so you might want to reconsider that as well.
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Old 15-12-17, 18:17   #6
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Yes, I get your point but that's not the advice I think he needs. You're basically saying "stop gambling on sports, start gambling on Bitcoin..." I'm telling you the current Bitcoin prices are insane. It's very speculative. And there are a lot of question marks about Bitcoin which we discussed in another thread. It's an interesting investment for people that are willing to take a risk - without question it's high-risk. Inter's buddy is dead broke and in debt. Will you loan him some money so he can invest in Bitcoin? Nobody else seemingly will.
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Old 15-12-17, 18:24   #7
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The other option the guy could pursue is declaring bankruptcy. But bankruptcy laws differ widely from country to country. So without knowing where Inter is based (I presume Italy but don't know for sure) and knowing the local laws concerning personal bankruptcy it's difficult to give any advice.
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Old 15-12-17, 18:25   #8
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Originally Posted by WiserthantheCrowd View Post
Yes, I get your point but that's not the advice I think he needs. You're basically saying "stop gambling on sports, start gambling on Bitcoin..." I'm telling you the current Bitcoin prices are insane. It's very speculative. And there are a lot of question marks about Bitcoin which we discussed in another thread. It's an interesting investment for people that are willing to take a risk - without question it's high-risk. Inter's buddy is dead broke and in debt. Will you loan him some money so he can invest in Bitcoin? Nobody else seemingly will.
Everything that I can afford to lose I already invested in Bitcoin, so the answer is no for loaning him money. But we also don't know how tough this situation is, obviously it's very tough and depressing, but what I mean is: is his situation sucidial-tier that if he doesn't solve this he will totally go insane, or his situation is more like "start from scratch and just work hard, be patient-tier" and it's more than possible to come back out of this whole that he's in right now. My advice is more for the first situation, if he's not in do or die situation then I would also agree with your option of working from scratch and being patient. But as I said, we don't know how serious it is and if it's even possible to do this with normal work, so we can't say more without knowing that really.
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Old 15-12-17, 18:37   #9
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Everything that I can afford to lose I already invested in Bitcoin, so the answer is no for loaning him money. But we also don't know how tough this situation is, obviously it's very tough and depressing, but what I mean is: is his situation sucidial-tier that if he doesn't solve this he will totally go insane, or his situation is more like "start from scratch and just work hard, be patient-tier" and it's more than possible to come back out of this whole that he's in right now. My advice is more for the first situation, if he's not in do or die situation then I would also agree with your option of working from scratch and being patient. But as I said, we don't know how serious it is and if it's even possible to do this with normal work, so we can't say more without knowing that really.
I guess my point would be even if the situation looks totally bleak today - house gone, car gone, wife gone, kids gone, etc. at least he's still healthy and has a job. Moreover, in most countries you can declare personal bankruptcy and get some relief from your debtors. There are options to get out of debt within a few years. Obviously our friend is going to have to own up to his mistake but it's not the end of the world. Based on Inter's account, I would not advise him to gamble again and Bitcoin right now would also be gambling. It would be better for him to work, make some money and find some other hobbies or interests to pursue. Gambling is not the right thing for him obviously. Just like some people can't handle booze. If you don't know your limits, you should best stay away.
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